The beaming couple paced graceful steps
While expectant relatives smiled and wept
To see son and daughter coming to rest
Before the priest to be religiously blessed
In expression of their love token
As marriage vows were solemnly spoken
Married now in the eyes of the Lord
Sharing their joy of a day unflawed
As microphone in hand, bride took to the stage
While music floated from walls of great age
I didn't understand much that was said
But hearing Celine Dion, my heart filled with dread
Gazing upon this vision all in white
As gleeful words were pronounced in delight
A sweat came upon me, and feeling rather sick
Knowing that truly, it wasn't the music
I thought it wise to make a calm exit
Should it turn awry, and I would have to leg it
An opening was shown somewhere to the right
As across wooden floors, I kept aim in sight
When clunk, clunk, clunk, the microphone did find
New sounds to add of a different kind
Amazed to be clunking around in the chantry
Now desperately searching for a way free
Escape was made to my huge relief
As I sighed for this day which beggared belief
When your cousin approached to see all was okay
So I reassured, unconvincing in sway
And was compelled to explain in halting French
That such antics were due to a seafood stench
The moral of this saga if one is to be told
Is if you're in love, do not lose what is bold
As when your heart's taken, you so aim to please
But be true to yourself, and such pressures will ease
So if ever in a restaurant, and the food smells vivid
Don't be shy, send it back, and show that you're livid!
