Through the old pictures

I happened to look through some old pictures today
Some are new...some are old and grey

I found the pictures i have of you
It's the only thing left i have to hold on to

And that's the thing about death...the questions you have after
Could i have helped? Did you do it on purpose? Was there not enough laughter?

And what really was going through your head?
What was the last line that you said?

Weren't you loved enough by family and friends?
Or couldn't you seem to meet both ends?

What really set this off in your mind?
What do you miss that you had to leave behind?

The promises you made to me, are they still real?
The pain you had...is that what i feel?

You told me you'd be with me forever
If we split apart, we'll always still be together

But how comes after you left my life went to hell?
Is it my fault I'm not living life well?

Is there any way that you can hear me at night?
Are you OK...are you alright?

And as much as i love you, I'm still mad
Because you were the most dependent friend i ever had

What the hell happened to make you leave?
Tell me something that i can believe!

You know you had friends and people DO care
Did you think we'd be the same if you weren't there?

God damn randy, why the hell did you leave me while i was so young?
Was there something i could've done?

Do you realize i still have dreams about you
Nightmares raze through my mind all night too

I STILL see you and i have to look again
Maybe it was time i could FINALLY see my best friend

Do you know HOW HARD it is to do this without you
I want to give up SO MUCH, nothing seems true

without you NOTHING SEEMS RIGHT
Living without you, i lost the damn fight

What do i have to do to get you back here?
Being without you was my only fear

And i still love you so damn much and it hurts so bad
I have to cope with your decision that still makes me so damn mad

But i know one day we'll meet again
And i can finally say words to a great friend