Only If I Ever Could

I see how your going about me,
Doing what you think will make me see,
I thought this was real,
Obviously I don't know what to feel.

My life was already broken,
Being with you, I was hoping,
Could make me believe again,
And give me a life without pain.

Obviously I thought wrong,
This has just gone on too long,
This is a jigsaw of pieces,
Your flirtatious mind, teases.

But still this remains a disaster,
Throughout smiles and laughter,
Trust was no longer a given,
Love was no longer living.

I am so confused today,
More confused then yesterday,
I gave you the key to my past,
I never knew the key would rust.

I was always so loyal to you,
And always I still want to,
I always want to love you,
Its just the thing I wanna do.

I just do not know if I should,
Only if I ever could,
I have never loved someone like you,
And I still want to.

Am I being stupid, being a fool?
I do not have to play by the rules,
And now that I have broken every rule of my own,
I am now left alone.

Is love real?
Cos I just do not know to feel,
Cos its just not going to plan,
Please babe, I do not understand.

I just do not know if I should,
Only if I ever could,
I have never loved someone like you,
And I still want to,
I just don't know if I love anymore,
Do not come knocking on my door,
I just do not know if I would,
Only if I ever could.