Untitled # 2

I have been much worse lately
at first i was scared
but now I'm okay
it is a new found strength
i can take the pain
not only the physical
but i am coping with the mental
the mental scares me more
than physical ever could
for you can't get away from your mind
it is in your soul
once you die
your body is gone
as is the physical pain
but your soul stays with you
i need to learn
how to delete my mind
one piece at a time
maybe someday
i will master this skill
and then i can die happily
by maybe taking a pill
who knows how it will end
i just hope its painful
because i don't know how to deal with no pain
i can only deal with pain
without it
where would i be?

just me kinda rambling on but in poem form lol