Sitting here,
with my head in my lap,
sitting alone,
in my room,
my radio blasting,
crying,
because of him,
agian,
why do i do this,
time and time agian,
i fall
but this time
i fear
i will not be able
to get back up
for i have
fallen once agian
harder than ever
never to reopen
my heart
to him
or any other
these tears,
are not the first
nor will they be
the last,
i know
for tomarow
once i see his
smiling face
he will not
have a clue
what kind of pain
he has put me through
it will be all
\"perfect\"
or apear so
at least
inside
there will
be hatred
and love
happiness
and sorrow
pain
and joy
all mixed together
one big
confusing
emotion,
something unexplainable
something
that one day
i will not miss
i want HIM
to be my one
my only
my MR RIGHT
yea right..
like im ever gonna have a mr right
theres no hope for me
he can have anyone he wants,
take his pick
but me
thats a whole
other story
hes popular
hes sexy
hes brave
me
im an outcast
im stuck
in the shadows
unnoticed
shy
i cant even talk
when hes around
in fear ill say something wrong
i cant be ME
even if i wanted to it wouldn\'t work
so here i am
head in my lap
tears streaming down
wondering why
did i ever let him in
i knew this was going
to happen
but still
i let it
i opened the door right up
just for this
this sorrow
these tears
the very ones that fall
from my eyes now
to just come on in
and yet
i still adore him
want him
long for him
love him
even after all this
all these emotions
he doesnt even know
me
i just stand
looking on
from afar
a simple
bystander
watching
him live his life
without me in it
and i know
il never be in it
all my friends
they try to tell me
he notices me
he likes me
he thinks im pretty
but is it true
will i ever know
not with being
shy i wont
but how can i change
me??
my shyness??
its too hard
im too confused
i just want out
i just want to fall into his arms
and have everything be all right
but still i sit
lonely in my room
radio blasting
welcome to my life
yea....
my life,
exactly
nobody knows what its like
sure they can try to relate
but theyll
never really know
so here i sit...
writing down all my feelings
sharing them with the world
for everyone to know
just an open
page
that leads
straight to
my heart
and all the
emotions
within me
so here it is
my life
my love
me
an outcast
the feelings
i feel
on a daily basis
just sitting here for you to read
some can relate but not
completely
understand
some will
have no clue
but i will always know
always
