I agree with emma...
Maybe if it was longer and more in depth it might make more of an impact to the reader...
But it's still a good piece
take care
kirsty xxx

Hey it was really nice but you do need to put more words like in between here like "I'm all by myself
I feel so alone again
In this mixed feeling in my life
All my head does is twirls and spins" something like I think--Rachel--