Swinging on the Smoke Ring

by Drew Gold   Oct 27, 2005


It feels
as if my life
is a smoke ring
circling endlessly
only to
circle out
off the tracks
of infinity

the smoke twirls
round and round
then into the air
it vanishes
without a sound

dragging on
until the next moment
passes and
twirls into
the nothingness
of everything

again

i wonder
how many rings
have come and gone
before me
and why i've chosen
not to count

or did i just forget

in the clouds
exhaled thickly from your
lips and mouth
i hold onto the circle
and the rings
to which we're bound
hoping not to fall off
yet knowing
the wind is always blowing

written not-so-sober. tear it apart -=X

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Latest Comments

  • 19 years ago

    by shadowlight

    This is quite good. It kept me hooked throughout and there was little chance for my mind to wander. however, i do prefer some of your other work I agree with sweetenigma basicly.

  • 19 years ago

    by HOLLY ARMER

    Lol, I like that..."written not so sober"! That's hilarious!
    As for the poem, I found it intriguing. The title captured my attention, but the poem held it! It's unlike anything I've ever read.
    I've tried to write while I'm "not-so sober" as you so eloquently put it, but nothing seems to come of it. I usually forget what I'm supposed to be attempting. Anyway, great job~Holly

  • 19 years ago

    by Bill Turner

    Feel free to write inebriated. This is great! The only change I would make would be to drop "and" from the first stanza. Awesome write!

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