To my friends

My friends, you all say you love me
And yet you all cause me such pain
You neglect me
Forget me
Overlook me
And use me

I try to pretend I am happy
For if I start to complain
You say I am just craving attention
You ignore it
Or complain about my scars
Saying that I don't mean what I say

How would you feel if I told you all
I have written and rewritten notes
To you all
That I would leave for you to read
And that I spend hours thinking about how
And what would be the quickest

Two is company, three is a crowd
That I now understand very well
It is just that I am too often that third person
I try to be kind
I try to be what you all want me to be
Much more then you expect from your selves

But no matter what I do
How much I give
I am never fully accepted
A wallflower at all parties
The last person invited

There is little to do about it
So I redraft another note
And try not to mention my feelings
Hoping one day

To be accepted