Smiling when i die.....

My pale skin
Is now stained red
And my eyes are sore
From all the tears Ive shed

Life wasnt supposed to be this way
I had it all planned out
I was going to be happy
But I should have considered the things I didnt know about

Then reality sunk in
And so did the knife in my hand
Why couldnt life be simple?
Why couldnt life go as planned?

Once I had the razors comfort
There was no other way
To let out and release the pain
That I felt everyday

I was always smiling on the outside
And saying that im well
But inside I was always crying
Lying to you all hurt like hell

When people found out
Most were completely shocked
When they found out bout my wrists
And the pills id popped

But even when they knew
Life still went on the same
Maybe it got worse
Now that everyone knew about my pain

When I didnt have a care in the world
Life was what you call perfect
But now life is different
And Im the only one who fells it

I want to be happy
I just want to go back
To when life was colourful
Not just filled with black

I hope I live a normal life
And be smiling when I die
But at the moment I dont fell that can happen
When all I think about Is suicide

Please leave a comment i want to know wether im gettting my views across to others ....if you like it say so and if you dont feel free to tell me