What gets me every time,
Isn't that you make no sense,
But that I keep trying to make sense of you,
It's impossible though,
You, your thoughts, your ways,
Perturbed and disturbed thoughts,
Manipulating and deceiving words,
You don't understand what love is,
Because you have never been loved,
For you to love me,
A miracle,
Yet comfort, I seek.
Continuously for what's not there,
No understanding or depth,
It can't be,
Even an animal can love,
I try to explain,
Why I feel so out of place,
How you can you be so dense,
I am lost,
It's all my fault,
For being the way I am,
I think, at least I want to think that,
It's so much easier to have a reason.
All my life I will search for what's not there,
And forever I will blame myself.
I will feel guilt for feeling the way I do,
For hating that I am a part of you.
