The Worst Thing I Could Do.........

Every night I sit in the dark and wonder why,
How everyday seems like life is speeding by,
The more I try to fix me,
I just end up turning into something i hate to be,
I try to tell you,
that somethings wrong,
I guess you just smile and play along,

I'm Feeling tired and it hasn't changed,
In my body i don't feel the same,
the restless nights,
the violent fights,
the sad memories,
of a young girl who use to be happy; me...

Its sad how i cant even figure out whats making me feel so bad,
Its sad to see me get irritated and mad,
The fear of me having the chance of depression,
Giving my boyfriend the wrong impression,
Am I looking for attention?
At school I'm so close to suspension,
My grades drop lower every weak,
Nowadays I cant even be bothered to speak,
Everything I f%$#&*^ say just doesn't make sense,
the more my emotions turn into the dense,

I hate how everyday I come off the bus with tears in my eyes,
The anger filling up of me, thinking my life is just built up of phony lies,
I cant even admit that i have depression,
I cant even admit to wards you my aggression,

Its OK I'll pretend I'm doing just fine,
There You go try and ignore my help signs,
Crying in front of you..
Would Be The Worst Thing I Could Do...