I suffer so much
it's hard to tell some days
whether or not i am still moving
still breathing on my own
and the biggest pain
that i have been suffering from for so long
is sadly summed up in one word
though mine is made so complex
doubt
i have do it daily
i happens on its own
i doubt everything in my life
is true or not
whether or not
my friends truly like me
whether or not
people truly love me
whether or not
i deserve to live
and the most of them all
can not be chosen as one but:
whether or not
i will ever be happy
i will get want i want
and actually as after you say that out loud
the most clear one in you life
that causes the most unease
can be easily realized
whether or not
my special person
can love me again
yes, i see that now
it has taken over my life
i just want to be happy
and i can't be without them
i need them
i have to have them
if not
then what's the point
they are the only one
that knows all of me
and the only one i want to
i try so hard
to get their attention
for them to change their minds
or at least help me get through
these hard times
and when i say help me
i actually mean help
as in calling often
seeing me often
but not saying they are here
but actually never are
i suffer so much
i want to end it
i want my life to easier
i want them
to say they love me
and want to be with me
