Broken heart because of you

The radio is playing sad love songs
the first time i didn't cry
i held on tightly to the tears inside me
although i had to really try
i try explaining what it's like being me
but no one understands that all i want is to be free
i smile when people are around
leaving broken pieces of my heart falling to the ground
since you had left me i want to move on
but it's hard knowing your gone
i wonder why my biggest fears
haunts me with tears
you didn't have to go away
because now I'm not okay
my life is so much pain
driving me insane
all because of you i cry every night
wanting to find the light
you had made me risk my life
now i want to end it with a knife

this came into my mind when my b/f left me and i have so many problems in my life and i wanted to die so i would end it i cut my wrist it hurted alot i bleeded but nothing happen my friends saw it and started to cry and said don't go so i made a promise i wouldn't kill my self because all the depression people give me now i just have to learn to live with it it started when i was 7 and it just gets worse it never stops I'm only 12 trying to deal with life so please tell me what you guys think