"Suicidal Thoughts"

Words cant describe the feeling I feel
All I know is that it sure is real
All my life
Ive been wanting to be something great
Turns out my world has turned into hate
Youd think my world was perfect wouldnt you?
Well at first I thought that too
Until I started to feel like crap
All my good times came to a wrap
My family ignores me
They dont even care
I dont even think they notice that Im there
My friends at school dont acknowledge me
Thats not the way I thought it should be
What is life for
If its such a bore
When no one cares
And we cant make repairs
No one cares about me
And I dont know what Im meant to be
The other day I picked up the knife
No one was around
I put it up, thought things through
Then dropped it on the ground
The thoughts that went through my head
As the blade was close to my heart
Were those that stopped me from falling apart
I thought about the good things that are in my life
Like the people that actually do care
And acknowledge when Im there
Life wont always be bad
And If i ended it
That would truly be sad
I figured my parents would cry
And forever wonder why
So I picked up the knife
And put it back in the drawer
And I smiled
As I realized what lifes really for.

*I wrote this a while ago. Now I have everything I could ever want. Especially a loving bf whos the best one out there :)*