Hmm...It was a good idea. But they rhyming was a bit...not forced but all over the place. It does make many points but does not focus on any for too long which could be a good or a bad thing. I like the first stanza lots but I felt it needed another to end it with more finality.

The rhyming is okay. all of the stanzas are in a aaaa bbbb scheme. there are two that aren't but if you look closely maybe you'll see something.