Random thoughts and emotions running through my head,
I'm not really sure what I'm feeling.
Is it pain; is it love, or a feeling of dread?
Dread that someone will discover what I'm concealing.
They all think they know me and how I feel,
they think I have a perfect life and I am fine.
No one knows of the broken heart that I'm trying to heal,
of the thoughts I have that definitely aren't mine.
They say they don't understand why I'm in so much pain,
what cause I have to hate my life.
Every one of my days is filled with darkness and rain;
my thoughts dwell on past encounters with the knife.
I can no longer control what I am thinking,
There's a voice in my head telling me what to do.
Into this void of hunger I'm slowly sinking,
seeking perfection to reach dreams I pursue.
I never thought I'd hold onto him this long;
He broke my heart so why do I still love him?
I never knew love could go so wrong,
until he made my light once again dim.
So many emotions all tangled together,
and I don't even know where they come from.
A feeling of wanting to be light as a feather,
Finally being the girl I want to become.
