I was happy my life was fine,
I almost never complained.
Until one day my whole world fell apart,
though I don't understand all this pain.
Feeling lost in darkness, hoping for light,
without anyone to love.
I try and try and try to fight,
against this curse that's taking over me.
Sometimes I would give almost anything,
to block out all these thoughts.
The one way I have found to do this
leaves me with no control.
Starving and aching inside,
I sometimes just want to step off the edge.
As I look back to the time when I held my breath and almost died,
I feel my eyes fill with tears at the thought of me doing that to myself.
It is becoming harder and harder to face my fears,
and put a smile on my face.
Sometimes I cut right through the pain,
and finally feel relaxed.
Though all of this is destroying me,
I just keep holding on.
To the life that I know can be,
Tough at times but still good.
