Hmmm... okay... lets see... this was a very good poem... except it lacked a rythm which is something that could be easily fixed... try rereading your poem two or three times and see what I mean... i have read some of your other poems and they are fantastic so i know that you will be able to see what i mean in this particular one... i can tell your a excellent writer so keep up the good work....

sammie

This is a great poem. Again, I think you could make it longer, but I think that's only because I always write longer poems, like 8-10 stanzas or 36 liners. I really like the third stanza.

Tiffany.xox.

Hey I don't think it's necessary to make it longer! I like it!
Keep on writing!

This poem was really good and really emotional

Its deep, scary, different, unique, yet amazing! i loved it, keep writing, you are very good!

**meggie**