I think I've finally figured it out...
I'm not going to keep liking guys that I'll never have a chance with.
While the challenge is what keeps me going, I'm finally realizing not to waste my time with it
anymore.
It's a challenge I will never conquer.
I'm going to quit trying so hard, and just let it come to me.
My time will come, but right now it doesn't really matter.
You see, all this time I've wasted, while I could be having fun; istead I just keep hoping that maybe
he'll come around.
I'm going to wait for the guy who makes me understand he's worth it.
I want to be the one who is made to feel as though he really cares about me.
I want the guy who will send me 16 roses on my 16th birthday just because he can, and to know
what color is my favorite.
I want the guy who will answer a call from me in the middle of the night because I can't sleep and I
know I can count on him to be there - I want the guy who will call me in the middle of the night
becuase he can't sleep and he knows he can count on me to be there.
I want the guy who will talk to me about everything going on in his life - and let him be the one to
worry whether or not he's said too much.
I want the guy who will be surprise me at my house to take me out just because he can.
I want the guy who will call after every single game just to find out if we won, whether or not he
really cares.
I want the guy who will be by my side through everything.
I want the guy who will know exactly what I want, and know exactly what it takes to catch me.
I want the guy who isn't afraid to take a risk.
I want the guy who will treat me how I deserve to be treated.
...I've finally figured it out.
**Now, I'm not trying to go on and on about "me" and "what I want,"- I've just finally figured it out. And I'm not going to throw away all of my values and goals that I have set for myself just for one guy whom I'm not even sure will be there tomorrow. You've heard people say "live as if today was your last." But tell me, what happens if there is a tomorrow? What you did today will follow you tomorrow, and living with the consequences isn't worth living in the moment. I'm just glad that I've finally figured it out.
