Words of a Frightened Lover

by Daniel Mulvany   Dec 12, 2005


If I gave all I have inside would it be enough,
Or would you just assume that it was only but a crush?
For if I were to pour out every inch of every part,
Of every crevice that lay within my very broken, heavy heart,
I would have nothing left within myself but pain to show,
A pain that bears so heavily on my already weakened soul.
Could you turn and walk away without looking in my face,
To leave me here with this broken heart, alone within this place,
Where the walls all stare at me with grinning faces if to say,
You never had a chance in hell, yesterday or today?
Or is there but the slightest chance that you might show to me,
You reciprocating love to be a possibility?

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by LadyPearl

    Good poem, the lines seemed a bit long, Keep it up

  • 18 years ago

    by LostHopesCrimsonTears

    As usual, great work... two things though, first off here...

    "within my very broken empty heart"

    might i suggest loosing the "very" as it breaks the flow a bit using so many adjectives

    and here....

    "with grinning faces if to say"

    might i suggest changing it to
    "...as if to say"

    i dont really like to tell people to change things, as i really hate when its done to me, but just thought i might bring that to your attention is all. anyways, great job, yet again, a 5!

  • 18 years ago

    by Bri

    Aww, I thought this was quite good. Lots of adjectives =P 5/5

  • 18 years ago

    by Kayd

    I like it, it has a very certian flare to it

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