Seul

Before this I thought I'd felt
The pain of a 'heartbreak'
But they were just the trail runs
Of my beautiful mistakes

Before I could always talk about
The people who'd hurt me the most
But with you... it's just so different
The memories are what hurt the worst

I hadn't even realized
Just how much you'd meant to me
But when you just got up and left
I was raped with reality

I could say that I'm glad
Or that I'm happy that you're free
But it'd be just another lie
When it's difficult just to breathe

We can never again be friends
Being strangers just wouldn't work
You know my smiles are fake
I know your scars are worse

I thought I'd never stop the bleeding
That I'd never kill the pain
But hungers a great distraction
The only thing that kept me sane

I'm watching the world through a filter
Blocks out unmanageable grief
Keeps out my fears and the darkness
... Or was it what keeps them in?

I hate you for what you've done to me
Cos when you broke my barriers down
You built your own in foundations
Then took them and laughed
As you watched me drown

So choke on this poem... Darlin
Know that I HATE remembering you
That I look forward to seeing my skeleton
Knowing there's nothing anyone can do

I hate you for doing the right thing.