Not so happy new year

Happy new year!
Is it? Whats there to be happy about?
what's in store this year is probably just more pain
so where's the need to scream and shout?

Another year of joy! or not
Another year of sorrow
Relief at the end of each shitty day
until the recall of tomorrow

All the happy faces singing
everything spinning around me
i look on feeling numb, just watching
all these people, so happy.

Why are they so full of glee?
They think themselves lucky for what they've got
Loving family, friends, lovers
all the things that i have not.

One thing makes me happy though
on this new day of this year
is that someday, sooner or later
i will suddenly disappear.

As i look out of my window
at a view that strtches for miles to see
i know that i'll have left someday
to be somewhere that im happy.