Suicide VS My Mother

I don't know why i deserve this,
Was it something i did do?
I have but no more answers,
That's why I'm asking you.
I can see that we (your children) are not spoiled,
But that is no excuse.
I know Michelle gets money,
but I'm choosing not to see.
I thought that things had gotten better,
It seemed this way at first.
That is until your old friend alcohol arrived,
Then you sadly gave into his thirst.
You soon gave into temptation,
As your sanity melted away.
You carved long hacks into your arm,
Expecting me not to feel in anyway.
How stupid can you be ma?
I LOVED YOU....
but you took that away.