You're sitting there, so far yet so near
I feel your presence and it fills me with fear
I'm fighting the feelings, I'm fighting the pain
I'm trying so hard not to go back there again
How with one look or laugh can you pull me back
And with one look to you my healing heart cracks
I go into the other room, try to get away
But even as I'm running I fight the want to stay
You make me feel alone, yet I'm in a crowded place
My eyes are full of tears as I long to touch your face
Oozing confidence as I enter the party
I wonder if you're fooled, or if you know you're still part of me
I fear you believe this act of being over you
Inside I want you to know, and want you to want me back too
My friends all say you look at me while I glance away
I wish we could make eye contact, but I'm just way too afraid
So afraid that you don't want me, so afraid that you don't care
I sit hoping you'll find confidence to come and perch on my chair
I text you while I sit alone on the muddy floor
'I wanted to talk to you' I say, you'll read it and be bored
I would put myself out there and tell you what I feel
But you mean too much for that, and my wounds need to heal
Each time I see you I can't hide the thoughts
But you make me so scared I come back with some stupid retort
To some stupid guy telling some stupid joke
And because of my fears you don't know I want you, and not this random bloke
