Why Dad?

I keep asking myself why?,
Why did you want to die?
Wasn't i important too,
You would have left without saying "i love you".
You wouldn't have left any word,
Not a single goodbye i would have heard.
You wanted to leave me on my own,
To deal with all of this alone.
No body thought to tell me,
How life changing that would be.
You were meant to be someone i looked up to,
Instead now i can't stand to look at you.
You were meant to make me strong,
Instead death was your thought all along.
I would have been left with no one,
If you were dead and buried and gone.
I thought you loved me... I thought you cared,
But you were prepared to never be there.
I would have been left to cry by myself,
Without you i have no one else.
and yet You was prepared to let me go...
Selfish enough not to let me know.
But you're still here.. but I'm still sad...
Why Did You Want To Leave Me Dad??