What the Future Holds

Searching for the words that I am longing for
So I can write a poem
I just read all of my postings
And seeing how I have been alone

But not really am I lonely
I do not think I will fall apart
I look back on my writing
And realize I am living a brand new start

My days and my emotions
Ever change just like the tides
Sometimes happiness is flowing
Other times sadness fills my insides

But life has gotten better
No longer do I dwell
I will not let my circumstance
Make me feel like a living hell

I give some credit to Marissa
Whose spirits lift me up
She always says something positive
When life gets a little rough

Sometimes when I look back
At the poems I have written
It appears sadness had taken over
A life that once never lacked ambition

But somehow I am above it
I feel like I have moved ahead
Of getting all upset
About the loneliness in my head

My life is not so lonely
Even though I do not feel a love
That is everlasting and powerful
Or sent from heaven up above

My life feels a bit content
I have a small sense of delight
Knowing I am here for a reason
Surviving each and every night

I kiss my little girl
And give her lots of hugs
Knowing she is the reason
That we act like we are in love

She makes it seem worthwhile
Even though he and I are so distant
I believe God has a plan for me
Even though today I feel resistance

The plan does not include
Our little family
I know there are bigger dreams
More faith and reality

Somehow I sense a future
That is in the hands of a higher power
No longer will I be afraid
Of love or the final hour

I am picking up the pieces
Of a life that was heading down a lonely road
And giving way to happiness
And for hope of what the future holds