This poem is really emotional. i loved it. the only thing you could have done a little better is structure it. but keep up the great work.
love jess XXXXX

Eh... this has great potential... your wording is off right now.. so its not popping like it could... some poems are meant to be put in this format... but this one isnt i dont think... try putting it in regular format and change the wording into more descriptive and i think youll be all set...
amanda

I like tha 1 gud job joe