This one is good, but like your other one it's really short. I love how it rhymed and flowed though.
5/5

Good, but i think you could expand it more, give more feeling, get deeper. it seems to short(no offense) i think its a great begining and it'll and you'll go places!

if possible id do 4.5/5.. lol so 5/5

♥♥:Lauren: