The curse of a heart filled with love

The tears fall so hard,
and my heart beats so fast,
my breathing stops,
and my stomach churns.

I never thought I'd see the day,
When we would fall apart,
and right now it's killing me,
My all mustn't of been enough.

I always told everyone,
You were the only one,
I couldn't be without,
I couldn't get too close to you.

I fail to understand,
If you really loved me so,
how you can let me go,
Let me slip through your fingertips.

You crushed my world unfortunately,
I'll add you to the list,
Should I blame myself?
And find a reason for each tear?

I just can't do this without you,
I'm not ready to let go,
Do you here what I'm saying?
Can't you take your heart back to when you cared?

If I got a second chance,
I swear I'd be a better person,
I don't want my heart broken again,
I don't wanna be the old me.

The old me who was cheated happiness,
And was too blind too see,
The bad in these people,
Because I crave emotion.

But you really saw inside,
You even told me so,
You were inspired by the beauty I created,
And even at my worst, you saw my best.

You bought happiness and sunshine to my life,
Changed my world around,
But now the violins of heartbreak,
Follow in my footsteps.

Why am I punished for being in love?
Can cupid not rent me an arrow entwined in perfection?
Will God not send you back to me?
Doesn't everyone deserve a second chance?

Please don't feed me the "it's me not you" line,
Cos that only hurts more,
I feel like I was loving a lie,
But nothing had felt so good.

So whilst I'm stood here again,
Staring through my mascara smudged eyes,
Trying to look beneath my mask,
I see the smile which you gave me.

The sadness I was cursed with once before,
Appears to be contagious,
And without you I'm sick,
You made me.

Murmuring lyrics which were in our songs,
Staring straight ahead but not seeing clear,
My clouded eyes have seen too many storms,
Which were deprived of a rainbow.

You've showed me what I'm good for,
I'm the prize fool,
And after loving again,
You've proven it isn't for me.