WHY?

WHY? Why is this happening to me I do not know? Is this the way love is suppost to be shown? Why does he ask me to sit on his lap? Why if I don't he gives me a slap? Why do I freeze when he throws me on my knees? Why can't I just say NO! Please!? Why is he touching me like that? Did I do something bad? Why does this kind of love hurt so much? Why do I tremble by his touch? Why can't I just tell him NO!? Why this sadness that I have I cannot show? Why can't I tell my family? Do you think they won't want to be around me. Why is this suppost to be right? Will I be wrong if I put up a fight? Why does he say he loves me? but if I tell anyone, I will get beat. Why do I have to do this all alone? Why if I tell someone they take me away from home. Why do I lay in bed and cry every night? And not able sleep without a light? Why do I have to sleep on my stomach? Is this the only way I can get comfort? Why. Is what I have been asking myself for years. I am tired of crying all these tears. I am going to do something better for my life. And not be scared to do something right! He does not scare me anymore. Because I know I am something more. This went on for to long. And now I am long gone. I hope he is out there somewhere regreting what he did. And is never able to hurt another kid. Am I going to be able to have a life? YES! because I am choosing to stand up and fight!