Just another day at school
Not in such a good mood
Leave me alone, nothings wrong
Can\'t I just be quiet without being misconstrued?
I was quiet, so what?
I don\'t have to be cheerful all the time
My silence is nothing at all
So stop acting like it\'s a crime
But that\'s when it all started
The silence initiated it all
This is when it started emerging
The day that began my downfall
Sunny day back in 8th grade
Just felt like being silent for once
Silence isn\'t cause to be afraid
So why all the questions?
What\'s wrong Monica?
Nothing, nothing at all
Are you sure?
Positive, as far as I can recall
I said nothing was wrong
But I could feel my cheeks flushing
Why was I getting emotional?
Why did this question pierce my soul?
The day it all started
The time I began to \'change\'
The week when my soul departed
When I found my life to be so strange
I analyzed what was wrong
Suddenly repressed memories flooded my mind
I couldn\'t take it, couldn\'t maintain strong
My whole life as I knew it, was a lie
I wasn\'t the girl you see everyday
With a giant smile spread across her face
I faced my truth, my past
The past I dreaded so much, unable to replace
I remembered those nights not too long ago
When my dad was drunk, yelling, and abusive
Harming my mother, all for ego
Disrespecting my mom, while under the influence
I remembered those nights just the other day
When I visited my godmother
And her husband abused me everyday
Sick bastard never felt guilt
He waited till they left,
Then he committed his crime,
A crime going on since I was 4
Abusing me till I was no more
My soul was long gone
Ever since that first day
The day I stayed at home, while my aunt went to work
At the time I didn\'t know I was his prey
Reminiscing on those nights
That never seemed to stop
I felt as if I had no rights
With no say or no strength
I was a dead soul inside
Broken down, worn out and abused
Did he know deep inside i cried?
Did he know what his abuse caused?
That week when it all started
That night repressed memories flooded my mind
I remembered seeing cops at my door
Taking away my daddy while i was blind
I didn\'t know at the time
That my dad was a bad bad man
I thought he was just having a bad day like usual
Never noticed it went on every night
My poor mommy was harmed so much by him
He never touched me tho
Never in his life would he harm his little girl
But for my mom, no mercy did he show
Drunk with his friends,
Music so loud
Be quiet Monica,
It will be over in a while
The men in black with shiny badges would come
Bang Bang, Open the door!
Mommy whats going on?
Shhh, i cant talk, im on the floor
Oh mommy!
What happened?
My papi didnt do this!
Did he?
I never knew at the time
The kind of father i had
Never knew the kind of man my papi was,
just thought it was another day he was mad
When the men in black wouldnt come
my brother, my mommy and I would roam the night
Looking, searching, for shelter
We\'d always end of at my aunt\'s site
We\'d sleep over there for the night
Sure enough the next day my daddy was alright
Knocked out on the couch
Dead asleep, cause of last night
But 2 of the times, the men in black took us
We went to a place called
\'Domestic Violence shelter\'
Full of mommys like mine!
