Anger in the Heart

Why is it so hard to talk
When that is all you want to do
To let out the pain
To erase it from memory

To think back on those days
Is so hard for me now
Its all in my past
But it seems it'll haunt me forever

I was driven to this heartache
To this self-mutilation
Caught in a childhood
No one would want

Growing up too fast
Learning to defend myself
Letting people hurt me
Never telling only protecting

What makes theses people so special?
Why do I protect them when they hurt me?
I don't tell a soul
I hold it all in

I start to let it out
But its so hard to talk
Maybe I need help
But I'm not willing to tell it all

To remember brings memories
Of those dark nights
Rechid days
And horrible fights

How can any person grow up like that?
How can any parent hurt a child so bad?
Siblings who are supposed to protect
But who only hurt

When a childs all alone in the world
What is she supposed to do
She held onto every memory
Wishing only to get away

A childhood with so much anger
It hurts to remember
Tears fill my eyes
As I remember all those awful days

I just pray one day
I'll be able to finally get away
To stop holding back
To finally to be the one to attack