Rendered Useless

So as the day ebbs on
I go with the flow
being jostled about
battered and bruised

I am yelled at an mocked
never saying much
I just go in my room
and sit in hush

my mind races
as their cruel words fly
I have a sudden outburst
then sit there and try not to cry

I used to take out my blade
and bleed out the pain
but now it's broken
never to ease the hurt again

rendered useless
it sits in my drawer
the pain just build
as I sit upon the floor

I am so lost
without my blade
all this pain
I no longer know how to evade