Well done..i think this one could have been worded a little better though..you see since its in that form it tends to bring an upbeat. and your words are most likely meant to be slow, so if you put it in that form some word changes could be added and stuff to make it have a Perfect Flow
But i still give it a 5 to the fact..its truthful. its powerful and its from your heart
and thts a poem
Great job
5/5
~The Poet~