Of my own accord

Decisions to make as
I search for a meaning
to all this drama I
endure and create
all of my own accord.

This is dumb that
I do this to myself
I should be content
but I want so much
more but not for me
I want it for you.

I want to give you
your hearts desires
but it is beyond my
grasp I am such a ass
for the things I do
and say.

I love you I miss you
I need you by my side
you are the one the can
bring me back in focus
when I fell I am losing
my mind.

I tend to run from my
problems hoping they
will go away and indeed
for awhile they all fade
away.

Then suddenly there
they are again coming
at me like a rabid
dog tearing my life
apart.