I Never Knew

I never knew it could hurt so much,
To hold onto a lie,
Because the truth is that I'm not OK,
I'm dying on the inside.

I never knew this could happen to me,
I thought I would be safe,
How wrong was my preconception,
For it's my smile that they now take.

I never knew the world could be so cruel,
As to use people as pawns in its game,
To cause so much heartbreak and trauma,
Things will never again be the same.

I never knew it could be so hard,
To keep a promise to a friend,
To stay alive for one more day,
When all I want is for life to end.

I never knew that I never knew,
So many things about life,
Now I do, I want to leave,
So just hand over to me that knife...