My New Found Friend

Wow this is a really dark poem-I love dark poems, but rarely read them so I really enjoyed this. I love the flow and the format of the poem! Very strong poem-And it is made stronger by your use of repetition----Great write 5/5

I enjoyed this poem very much, but I still think there is a lot of room for improvement. Suicide and depression is such an overused topic, but evil telling someone to die and driving them to the edge is not so overused, so I can tolerate this poem. I'm generally not too fond of "speaking" in poetry, but with the repetition you placed before each speech, it worked well. You had some good use of language, which did very much strengthen the poem as a whole, so well done. The part that got me was the transition from 16th to 17th stanza where the subject dies...there isn't one. Another stanza between those, or even a period (-) should break up that shift and make it smoother. That was the only part that I felt let the poem down. Good job keep writing, keep improving.

I agree with Juls, you don't see poems structured such as this one is. It is well written and creates a story in itself. Although I did find this stanza choppy,

So I took my new
Found friend
By the hand

Eh, maybe my mind is just messing around with me again ^_^. But it was well written. I think I'm going to give it a 5/5.

-Tony

Great work. I never saw a poem set up like this one before, I mean having a convo. with the devil but still keeping a format of a poem. Great work I loved reading it. Keep up the great work.

~juls~

Damn, it is totally awesome, u rock, this is the first poem I read from u, n will come bak n check out more later, cause I gtg right now...