Hey, i think your poetry is really good but i think if you wrote it without all the slang words, it would sound better. Just a segestion.. but it is really good.
:) Danielle

Dat happens to be the best f**king poem i have ever read on this site..i reread it 5 times..you have a talent do not let it goo to waste 1000/10...amazing... really amazing

take care amy xxx