I did it to myself, She always blamed another. Never did she think that maybe it was her. Maybe you didn't talk
to her because she never looked up at you. Or maybe she was alone because she is shivering in her fears. She can't understand why someone would do this to themselves. But here she is made into exactly what she
was always making herself up to be. The girl she was isn't real, Everything she does is made into what she thinks people want around them. She cries for
attention in the most unsuccessful ways. Being mean is one of the major actions of this girl. Telling
lies to keep up her pretend world and her fake role in it. She has no personality, no goals, nothing
the only thing she has is memories. One's of brief moments in time where all her lies and expectations of them soared through the air and for a time made her happy. However her moments never last and nothing every
becomes of them except living lies that hurt. But she did it to herself, nobody ever told her that she had
to make herself into the person she wanted to be and not what she thought others wanted her to be. As time goes on and she gets older, the people she had worked so hard for now start to fan out and go their own ways.
She never had away or any kind of a life of her own. She feels like nothing can save her, that she has passed the point of no return. Can there be a small fraction of hope for her in the future. Or is it already done. She
would never admit that she hated being alone but then want to be alone because its hard to lie and pretend all the time. She was never happy, but you wouldn't know because she would never tell you and if you got
to close to such a subject like that with her she would dive for any chance to make you forget you asked that question.
Like smiling and looking you right in your eye's and saying something funny. People seem to find comfort in thinking that laughing must mean there's nothing wrong, and its sad to think but you can hide behind anything when you are
laughing. You can hide with it when you look like a fool, tough questions, and also when you are trying to ease a temper. You can
cover over anything with a good smile. She is alone, there is no one to convince, so she stops pretending. Soon they will all find out what she really is. Her morals and crazed thoughts placed so high, she'd never want to be around to hear what they would say and think of her. She isn't a broken person because there was never really a person
to break, she was a lie. She killed herself a long time before she killed herself that night. Such shock filled the minds of all those that stood above her looking down. Thought wouldn't come round,all that could be was for the water to come down. She did it to herself. She failed at life, she did it to herself, she killed herself that night, she did it to herself.
I cry, grab the knife and think of only one thing, I did it to myself.
