Gone Away Forever

I look at you with loathing and disgust.
You weren't there to see me grow.
What it feels like to have a big sister to look up to,
I guess I'll never know.
You want to pretend like you never left.
Like you weren't gone for seven years.
Pretend that whenever I cried,
you were the one that dried my tears.
But pretending that something happened,
doesn't make it become true.
I'm always acting as if it's sunny and bright.
But I'm only mad and hurt when it comes to you.
Now your back here again.
And I still don't know who you are.
Because even though you seem so close,
I have to keep you so far.