The Voice

Though my life I've heard a voice
It tells me my friends really care
It tells me I am loved by those I know
It helps me ignore their stares

The voice I hear grows louder
As its message gets harder to believe
As people around me forget me
As I feel things they can not conceive

The voice tells me to hang on and stay strong
When self loathing drives me to my knees
It tells me I'm not worthless or useless
There must be something inside me it sees

When I feel tears prick my eyes
Fro reasons I no longer know
The voice is the one that calms me
Helps me to fake it, to put up a show

The voice I hear never leaves me
For other more interesting things
It carries me through the unbearable
When there is turbulence it steadies my wings

But one day the voice is silent
I must go through the day alone
I must fight off my sense of self hate
I must ignore my friend's sarcastic tones

But that one day is too much to bear
Without my special voice by my side
So I find my pills and some vodka
And settle for my one last ride

But the last thing I do before leaving
And joining those who've past on
I leave a note to those who knew me
To help them understand what I've done

"I thought I had a special friend
For the rest of you no longer cared
It was always there to help me
When the burden was too heavy to bear

But after one day of its silence
What dawned on me filled me with dread
The only true friend I ever had
Was only inside my head"