What's the deal?

Where's my life?
when's my turn?
over bearing thoughts of failure
my head's a blur
what's going on
what's the deal?
Am I still dreaming
awake on the feel?
A touch on my skin
the butterflies race
kiss me sweet
I love your taste
And all the while
the clock is turning
the calender controls
the minutes burning
Escape again
sink into my skin
I'll melt it away
I'll make it begin
to run and to fly
to fall and to hurt
to taste of nothing
life's lingering flirt
on the bus
on my way
Is it now?
Is it here?
But where is my home
in this belly of fear.

by Cathy Cheryk 2003