Thinking back to when it first began..
the very first of many times..
it happened a lot like this.
& maybe you're not suppose to understand right now..
maybe I'm not even suppose to know whats happening..
maybe.
but i remember the feeling..
its very clear to me,
not something that i could forget to easily.
it's so strange,
it tugs and it makes such a mess, it leaves you completely drained..
feeling like there is no one to turn to,
it's that feeling that turns your whole life upside down...
and it does,
but only once that feeling has been turned into something beautiful...
oh ooh so beautiful, and then it's taken and smashed into a million, tiny, little pieces of hurt right before your eyes,
and you don't understand why it's happening,
but then you realize your the one smashing this dream into something so unbearable you wouldn't wish it on anyone..
not even your worst enemy.
I'm afraid of this feeling
i feel the need to run..
to turn around and run in the other direction,
it's so much simpler.