My third wish

I don't know where I am anymore
I don't know who I am anymore
All I know is what I want more then anything.

I was asked,
"If you had three wishes what would they be?"
"firstly, for all my friends to be happy, Secondly for my family to be financially secure, and third... For me to be dead"

I feel like everyone around me is moving forward, but I'm being dragged behind draped in chains...
Like I'm going forward, but not on my own and I'm trapt,
Moving forward but stuck.

I want to explain how exhausted I am,
How I'm tired when I wake up
How I have no strength but to let my feelings of
WORTHLESS
STUPID
FAT
UGLY
HOPELESS
WEAK
SCARED
SCARRED
CHANGELESS
FUKED UP
to take over,
Too weak to fight them off,
Every morning I wake up afraid to live,
Dark images of nothing float threw my brain,
I'm scared to close my eyes because of what I might see or think
I live in the dark all the time
Devils and demons dancing in the shadows,

I wish my third wish would come true...