My dieing day, has come

Life is over there is nothing I can do
So much pain, cannot stand with it alone.
All by myself in this lonely world!
No one cares about one helpless soul.
No one wants to help, no one cares to look.
No wants to wonder what this life feels like.
Why do we live it? Why did it have to begin?
Know one seems to have the heart that cares.
Everyone sees and stares.
They don't love me but they talk about me all the time.
Play your life like it matters.
But I don't even know how to be happy and not sin.
cant control the pain, it wont stop.
The cuts Ive made this is all a shock!
I wish I had the strength, the power to end it all.
But I just keep continuing to drop and fall.
I don't know how to find the happiness,
Then I would really smile.
Not this lying laugh or fake smile.
I want to have a heart thats not torn.
This is the pain I cry at night.
Tears to wake up to in the morning.
Sadness I can only see.
No love is ever there.
I don't feel safe even if I'm with anyone.
I hurt myself, I cant help it.
Little pain and lots of pain have no difference.
Anymore pain I get just adds on to the pain I am carrying on my shoulders.
I just want to end this crap with out starting over.
This life is so hard to beat.
I'm ready to give up.
So many people say they don't want me to end it all.
But I cant stand this, to stumble everyday and fall!
Give me a hand to help me back on my feet.
Seems like no one is there at all, but now its my time to die.
Ill shine just like that star!
In my grave, down in the dirt far.