Sliceing

I love to see the blood drip down.. then stain my beautiful skin..
ripping it till it covers my numb hand.. deeply slicing as i cry from all the heart aches.. my emotions getting worst as i get lost in thought
oh how i wish to be happy.
then i wouldn't bleed..
to feel as if i accomplished something.. its like a cant stop.. unless i see it run down my hand... dripping down my arm.. no longer can i see my wrist.. i move to my leg.. cut it so softly.. the blood starts to seep..i feel it run down my leg.. such cold blood... and to feel it drip from my wound.. i close my eyes as i breath so heavily..I'm reducing all my pain.. as i make another cut...i know its a different cut... this would be my last one. then all the suffering would be all gone.. within one more slice with my own hands controlling... i feel it squirting out... covering me all... i feel as if i need this.. to conquer all my fears...every day its come to this.. my decision whether i should end it all..but this is the last time...if u try to find me.. i will be slicing...yes slicing!
until my strength is all gone... one more slice... to my throat...just push it right through... the blood pours out..i scream i love you...as if someone can hear me...like my love who killed herself like i am...and this is where i fade... no more slices with my knife...i am no longer here