Not a dream

Can this be real or is it just a horrible dream?? is it possible for a heart to hurt this much. more and more the pain swallows me. every second is devastating to know your not mine. my mind is spinning, twirling, and twisting with your face around every corner. i feel tears rolling down my cheek every time your name is mentioned. it scares me to know that my heart hurts so bad that i might end up doing something stupid. you say that i will be fine and its not completely over....is it ?? i once told you i love you...so i stick to my word in saying forever......if you love me so much, more than anything......then why aren't you with me .......not her!!