Innocent's Crybaby

Sometimes I feel that I am not good enough for myself.
That I want to be a different person, one with life's wealth.

I feed on music that calms my insecurities.
I hunger to be the girl inside me.

I often feel sorry for myself and burst into tears.
As I sit, thinking of my life's nightmares over the years.

My tears flow from bad memories and choices.
Ones that I made blamed by other people's voices.

I seek out to help others but can not help me.
I am steadily trying to figure out who I want to be.

I dream of being the perfect human.
But I know that's not a possible fulfillment.

I cry because I don't know who I am.
I cry because no one seeks to help me find out.

I fear that I may live a dreadful life.
But dreaming the way I do will pay that price.

I listen to "Bruised" by Jack's Mannequin.
But I really need a "Holiday from Real".

I listen to those things and wonder.
If I will ever be as striking as thunder.

I am misunderstood and a crybaby.
I wish a knight in shining armor would save me.

For that I feel as if I am a hazard to my reflection.
But should be thinking of my life as a blessing.

My insides feel like the perfect shade of "Dark Blue".
I look at my twin in the mirror and tell her "I don't want to be you."

But I am her and I have to face it.
Though I wish I had a replacement.

For this hideous feeling I share with my self.
For wanting to be a person with life's wealth.

For reading too many romance novels.
Wishing I were the characters and that would solve my problems.

But it is the zodiac's cancer in me.
I am what I am and what I see.

But I wish to be the girl inside me that I feel.
For the person that feels is pure and real.

Innocent Crybaby*