Wow, that was such an intense story. Thank God it was fictional! I've always had a fear of getting hit by a car. I don't know why. It's really scary, I get visions at night of crashing a car, or getting run over! I just hope I don't die that way!!! Ahhhh!!!! .. Awesome write!

Wow. How horrifying that would be!! I'm glad this poem is fictional!! But very well written, I totally felt for the character!! Great job! 5/5

Wow. this was a very good poem. but, it leads me to wonder. Tell me if I am right please, is he struck blind? that's what it sounds like to me.

great job on the writing. the images that conjured in my head were just lovely. 5/5

This was a rather interesting poem, there is one thing I must comment, and that is the repitition of the word 'please' in the first verse. I thought it was a bit too much. There was only one word in between the three of them. It could just be me being picky, but I don't know, if you like it the way it is, then that's cool too. I like how this poem tells a story, that is why it seemed so interesting. Not a very happy ending, but it was really good.

Wow, I just realized I've read this poem too many times, and each time seemed different yet the same.. Sorry J. Lau

Awww thats sad did she die? i liked this poem a lot it was very well written 5/5

Aww. i find it really hard to write fictional poetry, so well done, this was amazing. i loved it

much love and many kisses,
bex

I loved this one. it was amazing. the emotion was brilliant & it is sooo sad

Mysterious! I looove it!