Can't Find Myself

Who am I
why was I even born
I'm just a beating heart,
ripped out,
a piece of paper torn.

What's wrong with me
and why can't anyone see
the pain that hides
like knives inside me

Like a river I cry
and my heart stings
like an open sore
and with my hands
hiding my ugly face
I sit in a corner
and cry alone on the floor.

Could you tell me
why you hate me?
Why you don't
really need me at all?
It should be my own blood
just splattered across the wall.

How much more can I take
before I just snap
and can't take it any longer
the words they scream
and acts of hate
and no ones there
to make me stronger.

And although
I haven't told anyone
they make me hate myself
and now I feel like i want to die
just let everything go
without a glance, or good bye.

Maybe I should wear a mask
this is what happens
when you expose your pain
but its really only my fault
I'm the only one to really blame.

When someone tells you
to your face
that they wish you were dead
don't you wonder
if maybe their right
millions of tears have been shed.

and she doesn't know
if there will ever
be someone to care
to look in her eyes
but really see her soul in there.

and she doesn't know
if she should hide
being everyone hates her
for who she really is
and she feels so dead inside.

and the things that they say
are making her hate herself
she wants to run for away
her soul a melt.

she can't deal with it any longer
and she's afraid to comit
suide, but she cannot see and
do nothing, for to many nights shes cried.

Cut up my heart
in the smallest pieces
and throw them
in the stove
its the last step
off the cliff

and she douve.

and she cuts her skin once
for every single tear
she can't even find herself
when she looks in the mirror.